Absorption, Tolerance, Sensitivity
Here's a new idea built on top of some of the Five Love Languages concepts by Gary Chapman.
It answers the question, how do we keep ourselves feeling loved in a relationship? What dynamics are at play in "filling our love tank" as Dr. Chapman discusses. I made up a few terms to use when discussing the dynamic of "filling one's love tank." Here are the terms and their meanings.
A Tolerance for Depreciation is how much of a "reservoir" of available love that you keep available in your heart for withdraws from your love tank. A huge tolerance means that you can be starved for love a long time because you a high reservoir. You have that love available. A low tolerance means that your reservoir isn't very full or is always running on empty. That means that you don't have much room for heavy depletions. Low tolerance people have to be constantly loved on.
If you have a high tolerance for depreciation, then you can afford to lose a lot a love. If you have no tolerance, then you can't afford it.
Absorption Rate is the speed at which you absorb love. High absorption means you absorb love from all 5 languages and at every opportunity. You see love in ways others don't. After most people read the Five Love Languages, they increase their Absorption rate.
The other factor is a high sensitivity versus a low sensitivity. The Sensitivity is the rate at which love is emptied. High Sensitivity is a quick loss of love. Sensitivity is like a leaky bucket. How quickly do you go from feeling completely loved to devastated? That's a measure of Sensitivity.
So Absorption is the ability to find love. Tolerance is the ability to save love up for later. And having low Sensitivity is the ability to keep from losing more love than you want to.
Feeling Loved comes from learning high Absorption, high Tolerance and low Sensitivity. Let me know what you think about these new terms. Can you see any practical application in your current relationships? Where are facile and where are you still learning Absorption, Tolerance or Sensitivity? Which variables are you learning to improve? Which factors are damaging or depleting your relationship the quickest right now? Anything you can learn from right now?
It answers the question, how do we keep ourselves feeling loved in a relationship? What dynamics are at play in "filling our love tank" as Dr. Chapman discusses. I made up a few terms to use when discussing the dynamic of "filling one's love tank." Here are the terms and their meanings.
A Tolerance for Depreciation is how much of a "reservoir" of available love that you keep available in your heart for withdraws from your love tank. A huge tolerance means that you can be starved for love a long time because you a high reservoir. You have that love available. A low tolerance means that your reservoir isn't very full or is always running on empty. That means that you don't have much room for heavy depletions. Low tolerance people have to be constantly loved on.
If you have a high tolerance for depreciation, then you can afford to lose a lot a love. If you have no tolerance, then you can't afford it.
Absorption Rate is the speed at which you absorb love. High absorption means you absorb love from all 5 languages and at every opportunity. You see love in ways others don't. After most people read the Five Love Languages, they increase their Absorption rate.
The other factor is a high sensitivity versus a low sensitivity. The Sensitivity is the rate at which love is emptied. High Sensitivity is a quick loss of love. Sensitivity is like a leaky bucket. How quickly do you go from feeling completely loved to devastated? That's a measure of Sensitivity.
So Absorption is the ability to find love. Tolerance is the ability to save love up for later. And having low Sensitivity is the ability to keep from losing more love than you want to.
Feeling Loved comes from learning high Absorption, high Tolerance and low Sensitivity. Let me know what you think about these new terms. Can you see any practical application in your current relationships? Where are facile and where are you still learning Absorption, Tolerance or Sensitivity? Which variables are you learning to improve? Which factors are damaging or depleting your relationship the quickest right now? Anything you can learn from right now?
Labels: relationship tips
posted by Mark Berry at
5:04 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home